Meh Series

  Scene 1: The Apartment Alan sat on the couch, watching a microwave that wasn’t plugged in. It beeped every ten seconds anyway. Today was his birthday. He knew this because his calendar, which hadn’t been updated since 2019, had today’s date circled in red marker—with the words “Alan’s Probable Birthday?” scribbled underneath in his own handwriting. From the kitchen, his roommate Gerald emerged, holding a balloon that had “Happy Bar Mitzvah!” written on it in Comic Sans. He handed it to Alan wordlessly and then sat down on the floor to knit a single glove using spaghetti. “Thanks,” Alan said. “I’ve always wanted cultural confusion on my special day.” Gerald didn’t look up. “I got it from a party supply dumpster. It still had air. That’s rare.” Scene 2: The Elevator Later, Alan decided to treat himself. He pressed the button for the building’s elevator, which promptly opened to reveal a room filled with live chickens and one confused opera singer humming the Jeopardy! ...

      Speed was halfway through his extra extra Monster Mac , surrounded by wrappers and a suspiciously sentient energy drink can, when his phone buzzed. “Yo, it’s your turn,” Meh’s voice crackled through the speaker. “Bro, I’m eating!” Speed replied, a fry falling dramatically in slow motion from his mouth. “Nope,” Meh said. “New villain. His name’s Deeps .” Speed blinked. “Like… me backwards?” “Exactly,” Meh said. “He’s your reverse. Same powers. Same speed. But… opposite.” Then the line cut out with a meh -click. Chapter 2: Deeps Appears The sky shimmered. Time hiccuped. And suddenly, in a swirl of reverse lightning , Deeps appeared. He looked just like Speed—except everything was… backwards. His jacket was zipped from the bottom up. His hair flowed in reverse. He walked forward, but his footsteps sounded rewound . He talked… in backwards sentences. “Desrever saw ti. Em pleh nac uoy fi eno ma I.” Speed narrowed his eyes. “Bro. You’re glitching....

  Chapter 1: The Day the Alarms Came At 8:00 AM sharp, the world of Meh was ambushed. Not by explosions. Not by lasers. But by… calendars . Thousands of synchronized alarms rang out across Meh Town. Schedules printed themselves on pancakes. Notification popups attacked people’s dreams. Every citizen suddenly had a to-do list stapled to their face. “WHAT IS THIS?” shouted Explosion, trying to detonate a motivational quote. “It’s… organized,” said Mind, horrified. Then came the announcement from the sky: “Greetings. I am Professor Productivity . You are now part of my Five-Year Efficiency Plan™.” Meh blinked. “This is worse than that time we ran out of tacos.” Chapter 2: Enter the Professor Professor Productivity wore a gray power suit, carried twelve clipboards at once, and traveled by spreadsheet. His glasses had built-in reminders, and he rode a hoverboard that beeped every 30 seconds to track his steps. His powers? Turning free time into meeting invites. Tr...

      Meh was bored again one day, and he decided to go to town again. He wanted to make sure that everything was safe. Little did he know, there would be a villain absorbing the life out of people in town. Meh wasn't too late when he saw the life absorber. Luckily, the life absorber only absorbed 2 lives. Meh decided that it was finally his turn to put a stop to a villain. Meh enabled unlimited lives before battling him. Finally, Meh and the life absorber encountered each other.      The life absorber tried to absorb the life out of Meh and he did absorb a life outta Meh but was confused after, when Meh didn't pass out. Meh said, "This is too boring, and he looked at the life absorber. He fainted, and Meh teleported him to his jail. The Life absorber was locked up in jail cell #1627453 on floor 589. Meh said, "My job is done!" and he went back to town.  But as Meh strolled back into town, sipping a lukewarm soda he found on the sidewalk, something str...